Seventieth Entry in the Charles Daniels Unauthorized Programme Guide O' Wrong Numbers Serial SSS - Peanut Of The Dustbins - Escaping from the Dustbins, the TARDIS lands on a planet-sized peanut named Spiridon. Jo has used her eerie knowledge of the bed deployment system aboard the TARDIS and she has offered the Doctor some mid-flight entertainment. The Doctor is in an old body and nearly killed by Jo's young energy. After landing Jo realises she's done more to the Doctor than she expected. Scared, and not aware of the Doctor's amazing recuperative powers, she notes the Doctor has not yet recovered from their physical activity. Stumbling out of the TARDIS she sees the bumper sticker newly affixed to the door "If This Capsules a'rockin' don't come a'knockin'" and feels a twinge of guilt. Jo then sets out to find help and meets old acquaintances of the Time Lord, the Dulls, who are on a suicide mission to eat the entire peanut, thus killing themselves and the Dustbins whom are tidying it. Jo contracts an embarrassing fungus disease from one of the natives and is kidnapped by an invisible obscene phone caller transvestite. The purple fur coated pervert takes an interest in Jo and makes a very disgusting bargain to get a cure. The Dulls tell the Doctor, now recovered and wandering the planet half naked looking for his pen, that there are thousands of Dapol Dustbins on Spiridon, immobilised by ice cubes but ready to become an army and conquer the Galaxy with the unwilling help of the perverts of Spiridon, who retain the secret of invisibility and talking dirty but still being able to pull chicks. The Doctor is quickly captured by the Dustbins and forced to give countless politically correct pep talks to the Dull prisoners. After watching them play backgammon for several hours the Doctor waits until something exciting happens. On the peanut's surface Jo and the invisible Eddie Izzard admirer discover the Dustbins plans to explode bombs of Insto-Tidy, which is both a powerful cleaning and killing agent. As the bomb clicks down closer and closer to zero, Jo finally does something intelligent and sets them back all the way to off. Her obscene friend is amazed at her creative solution, but she explains her microwave works the same way at home. The Doctor escapes miraculously, off camera, finds the resting place of the Dapol Dustbins and then easily washes them away when he tips over his glass of ice water on top of them. Book(s)/Other Related - Doctor Who Cracks A Nut Doctor Mysterio Vortex Bouncy Bouncy A Go-Go What To Wear For A Night On The Town When You're Transparent Fluffs - Pertwee seemed nuts for most this story Pertwee refuses to help the Dulls until they help him look for his pen, this is not in the original script and obviously not done in character. Fashion Victims - Jo's flares and shoulder pads, also her mood ring and rainbow friendship bracelet The obscene phone caller's unfortunate fashion statement of a purple fur coat makes this story Eddie Izzard Meets The Invisible Man Fashion Triumphs - Jo with her kit off for both the Doctor and the Dustbins Goofs - Trapped underneath Jo with a dwindling air supply, the Doctor takes time to remove all remaining clothing and change the batteries in the sonic screwdriver for his companion. The door handles on the Dull spaceship move in circle revealing either "Vacant" or "Occupied". The ship also contains a rotary phone and apparently even in a Dustbin war zone pizza delivery is still guaranteed in under 30 minutes. When the Dulls take cover in the plain of stones in episode 4, a huge dark shape, which is actually an alcoholic stagehand wandering into the shot, can be seen. The second Dustbin, pursuing Jo and the obscene phone caller, knocks into a polystyrene "rock" and as it falls it knocks the aforementioned stagehand unconscious. The two illegally hired foreigner stagecrew who operate the door on the Dustbin ship can clearly be seen lounging around the set when not opening or closing doors. The Dustbin Supreme's lights are amazingly out of sync with his dialogue and appear to be simple christmas lights! The Doctor seems to have forgotten that he chased the Dustbins to Spiridon, and he obviously isn't aware of the story title because he is shocked to see a Dustbin at the end of episode 1. Technobabble - The Dustbins use an anti-dust-reflecting shield to combat dust wave emissions. The Doctor turns the TARDIS log into a Dustbin killing device by dismantling the circuitry, reversing the polarity, and turning it into a low power short wave radio that only plays news reports about mysterious castaways stranded on some uncharted desert island Links & References - The Doctor, wounded by an American (Full-Frontal In Space) does not have the stamina to keep up with Jo. The Doctor when captured by the Dustbins screams "I have fought your evil since the beginning of Serial B!" When questioned about this he mentions the recent story The Mootants has thrown everything into question. Due to his comments in this story the Radio Times and several programme guides list this story as - "Serial B: The Dead Planet Dustbin Mutants Beyond The Sun". The Doctor name drops Ian, Barbara, and Susan because the Dulls have recorded these people as the most interesting they have ever encountered. Untelevised Misadventures - The Doctor mentions he once talked to God for about three minutes as apparently the almighty needed some advice about the universe which he was happy to provide. Dialogue Disasters - Doctor: (After smashing a Dustbin) You know for a man who abhors violence....DAMN THAT KICKED ASS! Doctor: Courage isn't not being frightened. It's being frightened, running away and lying about what you did afterwards! Dialogue Triumphs - Dull: In our legends there is a being. A god from another planet who comes to us in the time of greatest peril. Doctor: That is *I*! Dull: You are the great and mighty blue elephant of the stars who destroys all enemies with 16 flaming swords brought forth from 16 hands and who screams from 32 faces? Doctor: Umm...no. I AM...The DOCTOR! Dull: Ohhh..yeah, well there's that guy too. Dull: What of Ian, Barbara, and Susan? Doctor: Well Ian and Barbara went off and did their own kinky thing back in 1960s England. Dull: And Susan? Doctor: Oh, I abandoned her in a war torn futuristic wasteland. Dull: That is terrible. Doctor: Well, the girl was cutting in on my drinkin' time. The Classic Doctor and Dull pep talk scene - Doctor: Remember, when you go home, don't stop short of glorifying war. Dull: But it was a horrible thing. Doctor: Yes, but at least when you were killing people you were SOMEWHAT interesting. I've travelled the cosmos and I've never met a species more dull than you. Even the Eckers were more interesting. Remember, don't just tell them about the loneliness and the fear, tell them about the kick ass thrill you get from smashing Dustbins. Dull: But that's madness! Doctor: Well I'm sick and tired of fightin' the buggers by myself! Viewers' Quotes - "Whoa man! I have NO CLUE that the Dustbins were going to show up like that. I mean I read the title and I knew the Peanut belonged to the Dustbins, but that they would actually SHOW UP? Totally floored me!" - Prof. I.M. Moron, April 1973 "Mmm..peanut." - Homer Simpson (1995) "Even though it lacks a sense of wonder or any originality whatsoever, it at least tries to be an epic story about the impossibility of eating a planet sized peanut as the only possible avenue of freedom. It's kind of an allegory for the Scottish bid for independence if you just pretend the English are the Dustbins and Scotland is a peanut." - Doctor Who: An Adventure In Sandwhich Spreads, Tim Robbinson (1986) "I love it! It's a rewrite of the original Dustbins story with more invisible transvestites, nudity, and obscene phone calls!" - Charles Daniels (1999) Rumors & Facts - 1973 was a troubling time for the World's Favorite Mop Combo. The band had been on a downward spiral since 1969 when they released the completely uninspired album "Dust!" which spawned a spin off motion picture, which was immediately banned in Ireland, and ignored entirely elsewhere. In 1972 they came crawling back to Doctor Who to get some free publicity on a weekly basis. The first story Nightclub of the Dustbins was to promote their album "Rubber Hose" which also proved a disappointment. The additional attention paid to Rubber Hose in Peanut of the Dustbins was not noticed by the general public. The Dustbins were split down the middle on how they wanted to proceed artistically. Half of the combo, Dust Linen and one of the other Dustbins, wanted to continue to experiment with drugs and write groovy rock tunes. The other half, Crawl McDusty and whoever the other guy was on his side, wanted to live up to their reputations as vile killing machines who wreck havoc on the cosmos and put it back together all nice and tidy afterwards. Dust! (Linen/McDusty) Dust, My it's dusty, Dust, It's really dusty, Dust, you know I'm in dust, dust. When I was dustier, so much dustier than today, I never needed anybody's dust in any way. But now the dust is gone, I'm not so self assured, Now I find I've changed my mind and dusted up the doors. Dust me if you can, I'm feeling down And I do appreciate you cleanin' round. Dust me, get my sweep back off the ground, Won't you please, please dust me? And now my dust has changed in oh so many ways, My importance seems to vanish in the glaze. And every now and then I feel so insecure, I know that I just dust you like I've never done before. Dust me if you can, I'm feeling down And I do appreciate you cleanin' round. Dust me, get my sweep back off the ground, Won't you please, please dust me?