Thirty-First Entry in the Charles Daniels Unauthorized Programme Guide O' Carnage Film 2 - Dustbins: Vacation On Earth 2150AD - Earth is an eerie and tidy place in 2150AD. Subjected to a ferocious Dustbin vacation, it has been bombarded with scrub pads and fairy liquid. It's cities have been cleaned and human beings turned into living Dustmen. Only a small group of resistance slobs holds out in London. But then the brilliant scientist Dr. Who is transported into the future by a cheap plot device. He arrives determined to destroy the Dustbins. However the Doctor needs the help of his companions - A police man named Bert and his granddaughters Barbara and Susan. The Dustbins seem indefeatable however no one pays serious attention to Susan's various plans. Due to their arrogance Bert falls into Dustbin protuberances and becomes a dustman, Barbara is captured and has to be saved an annoying amount of times, Doctor Who himself almost gets made into a Dustman with a limp. Susan realises that she might have to work on her own to destroy the vile Dustbins once and for all. Susan figures out the Dustbins one weakness - cheap lager. If she can get them sick off cheap lager she will have them right where she wants them. She shares this information with Doctor Who who refuses to pay her any attention. Her older sister Barbara tells her she's just a stupid kid and should leave the real work up to the adults. This is the last straw. Susan sneaks into a Dustbin weapons factory and steals a machine gun. With her machine gun she robs a 7-11 for all their cheap watery ale. Doctor Who and Barbara are trying to destroy the Dustbins by organising a peace rally which will politely ask the Dustbins to leave before they wear out their welcome. Sickened by this liberal pinko hippie crap Susan kills all the demonstrators, the resistance slobs, blows away Barbara and finally machine guns down Doctor Who himself. Laughing at their short sighted stupidity she goes to Dustbin head quarters and gives them cheap lager. The Dustbins are so mentally damaged by the bad booze they become mindless servants of the young girl. Susan then sets out to rule the earth. Book(s)/Other Related - Doctor Who & The Granddaughter From Hell Susan - Last Of The Bad Ass Time Ladies rec.arts.dustbin.movies.susan-rules Fluffs - Cushing seemed confused for most of this movie "I say Susan isn't an ammo belt a little old for someone your age? Not To mention you're too young my child!" "And so the Dustmen have cleaned their last tidy clean thing that they've tidied." "Oh no!! Where did I put my sugar puff sandwich? Sugar Puff sandwiches are vital for...eating." Fashion Victims - Susan not only wears the infamous white head band but a Rambo-like ammo vest Goofs - Susan handles a machine gun amazingly well for a 12 year old girl, she can even shoot down enemies when the gun isn't loaded! That's talent. Technobabble - Susan explains that the Dustbins have a "Alcoholibity Factor of 12" and therefore can not handle the "hangover ions" that will bombard their mutant minds. Dialogue Disasters - DOCTOR WHO: So the Dustbins hold the Dustmen under their power? I should say that's kinky. BERT: I'm a Police Officer. Remember kids, Police Are Your Friends and we only very rarely beat innocent people to death and there's no framing up people unless we can do it extra damn well. BARBARA: Susan! SUSAN! You're always bugging us with your STUPID ideas! 'Doctor let's get the dustbins drunk', 'Barbara stop selling your body for cornflakes', 'Ian don't drink that sulphuric acid'. It's always the SAME childish nonsense. Now let us adults handle this. We know a lot more than you do! DUSTBINS: Euurregh. Whatever you say Susan. We Obey. We Love Watery Ale. Dialogue Triumphs - SUSAN: Time to die Barbara! DOCTOR WHO: Susan! NO! Not a machine gun!! SUSAN: Of course it's a machine gun! DOCTOR WHO: Wait! Have I been that horrible of a grandfather? Did I fail you so much that you have no remorse over killing your dear old granddad? SUSAN: Ahh, yeah. SUSAN: I rule the Earth! From this moment on there's going to be a lot more explosions around this place. Rumors & Facts - With the death of Doctor Who and the establishment of Susan Who as the sole cruel heartless dictator of the earth there was nowhere to go with sequels and for once in a science fiction film series someone actually paid attention to that. Never again would there be a Doctor Who film. He'd died in the hands of his own neglected drug and violence loving 12 year old granddaughter who goes on a world domination binge that would have made a young Drew Barrymore jealous. Later on a book series "The Adventures of Susan" would explore her fascist dominion over the earth with the aide of her Dustbin servants starting with "The Adventures of Susan #6: Warm Blood Cold Heart" and running until her ultimate control of the universe in "#16: Remembrance Of Susan". It is rumored that Susan shows some remorse over killing her grandfather however this is only hinted at in the elusive Director's Cut. In the Director's cut Susan steps on an orgami unicorn as she walks away from Doctor Who's bullet ridden corpse. This is apparently to refer to an earlier scene that was also removed showing Susan dreaming about good times with her grandfather on the planet of the unicorns. This was definitely one of the bloodiest Doctor Who adventures especially for it's time. The movie was made all the more surreal by playing cheery classical music during scenes of carnage, gunfire, and burning cities. Audiences had some forewarning about the nature of the film. The first scene shows Doctor Who, Bert, Barbara, and Susan sitting around a table drinking LSD tainted milk. This is quickly followed by scenes from Dustbin ravaged 2150AD London and the film picks up from there. From this opening many people have speculated that this entire film was a shared bad trip between the main characters however this is never said or hinted at on screen and either way everyone but Susan would obviously still be killed. This theory would open up the room for a third film in which Susan comes down from her trip out finds herself in a room full of dead people, cheap ordinary common dustbins, and bad programmes on channel five, however Roberta Tovey is MUCH older now so that would have had to be one very intense hit. Various visual, musical, thematic, and plot innovations in this film were later blatantly copied and out right stolen by a series of later lesser films such as A Clockwork Orange, Bladerunner, and Pulp Fiction. In France the film was named "La Femme Susan". The Russian title is literally "My Granddaughter With A Machine Gun" This film was banned in Ireland.