- LSD COLOURING BOOKS -
TEACHING KIDDIES THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN CRAYOLA

One of the most disturbing and evil products to come out of the popularity of Doctor Who was the LSD colouring book series. These books were designed to encourage the use of mind altering chemicals in younger persons and to further promote them to strike out against all forms of authority and rebel against all of nature in a mindless deluded rage -- I should know, I was their most avid supporter.

Over the years they produced a number of titles, the most notorious being the more longwinded of the assortment, such as -

"Dustbins Planet Kipple Colouring Book For Children and Sad Fan Collectors"

"The Sexual Toymaker Colouring Book for Questionable Adolescents and Sad Fans"

"The Cybermen High On Acid Colouring Book With Special Psychedelic Colouring Crayons For Hippies And Inner City Children"


Each of these volumes contained copious amounts of illicit substances in little plastic baggies and the use of the product destroyed moral and mental fibre in a way, that at the time, I thought was incredibly neat.

Then one day I had the great fortune to meet Father James O'Maley. A simple Irish priest who taught me the error of my ways and made me stand and watch as he consumed, smoked, and injected every drug in sight, simply so I could not take them instead. That is the sort of dedication which has made Father James O'Maley the only man to ever construct an entire Anglican Church by hand in under a fortnight. Powered by crank, speed, and various other stimulants he used the psychedelic colouring crayons to paint an astoundingly personal version of the Sistine Chapel ceiling, which shows god proudly baring not the spark of life to man but instead a foaming pint of Guinness.

Over the years I have sought out these books and given them all to Father James O'Maley. Proudly, I watch him consume and use countless pounds of nefarious mind altering chemicals, simply to be secure in the knowledge that local school children won't fall victim to their wicked temptations.

The LSD Colouring Books are the vile bastard children of the Doctor Who publishing world. That is why, I have decided to meet with various young, talented, creative people and instead create a new more healthy series of books called "Cannabis Crazy Colouring Cartoons"!
The theory behind this series is that once the children have smoked the colouring book, which is made of 100% Hemp, they will be far too relaxed to be of any threat to society! In fact we project that the purchase of cakes, crackers, and various delicious snacks will steadily increase as the incidents of violent crime, social revolution, and communist uprising fall into a marked decrease!

The Narcotic Colouring Books - Better Drawing Through Chemistry!